Woman - the sweet breath of life and the raging termagant. Who are we? Are we man's slave, man's angel or are we a powerful intelligence that creates her own experience that defines herself on her own terms without comparison to man or another woman? That is the question that I have struggled with myself; if I and many women of my acquaintance, especially my mother, did not define ourselves in relation to our influence or lack thereof on man or another woman, then who are we? In our quest for being understood and approved, we have denied the essence, power and joy of who we really are. All relationships have suffered, because we suffered ourselves as victims and lesser beings.

The only relationship that we have to control is the one with our Self. Unless we can establish value and respect for and of ourselves, we will never experience meaningful relationships with others. The role of woman, the stereotype of woman, has changed through recorded history. In the hunting and gathering societies, Woman was the provider of the family, the matriarch. With the influence and onslaught of the war lords, we turned to the role of victim and slave. Recently, in this century, we are again seeing and expecting woman to be powerful, in roles of leadership and major providers for the family; figures of community respect. So why the change and how do we determine which role defines us; who do we determine to be?

I am writing this article because I know that should women only accept who we are, come together in sisterhood and leave the bickering, clawing, and spitting cat fights behind, our world would heal; peace would be the legacy that we leave behind for our children, and our beloveds would be happy because we are. We bemuse them with our malcontent and our hissy fits. They would treat us as Goddesses should we give them the opportunity and the respect. You want to see harmony? Visualise women working together in a sacred sisterhood.

As a young girl I idolized Boadicea, matriarch, and mother, Celtic Queen of the Iceni in the early years of the Roman occupation of Britain. Her husband was the elected chief who led the community, but she was the born matriarch. So it was her responsibility to protect her people from the disrespect of the Roman War Lord Nero and his corrupt Prefect Catus and impugning tax gatherers. After she had been scourged and her daughters raped, she had had enough. From 61- 63 BC Boadicea chose to pick up her sword, drive her chariot, and kick butt. She gathered other British tribes and communities with her in their common cause and nearly drove the world-conquering Romans off their island. At the very last moment, she lost, because her vanguard restricted her retreat, and probably because there was a lack of cohesion and communication. That seemed to be the nemesis of the Celts and their downfall in general. The Romans led by General Suetonius, on the other hand, were very organized, communication was there forte, and together they moved as crushing phalanx and impenetrable columns.

Boadicea lost because she had not studied her opponent sufficiently. Her opponent was not the tax payer, the men of her culture or even the changing of the times. Her downfall was not the baggage carts tripping up and trapping the retreat. Her downfall was to not adequately assess her opponent who was conquering the world. She employed anger and emotion, destruction and chaos; all that she was against in these conquering Romans, without their keen strategizing. To engage in the "Might is Right" justification of the The War Lords was to betray the corruption which had already taken place in the ancient matriarchal societies. She focused on what she was against, not what she was for and invited defeat. The true test of the warrior is to never have to pick up the sword. She reveled in her opponents' defeat.

From her knee, the mother of her tribe, men could have learned the wisdom of the ancient ways and how to handle this new guy on the block. From her breast, Britain could have retained the ways of the Druids, the Bards, and of nature, but she underestimated the power of the wisdom she ignored and the force of the marauder she employed and ultimately turned against herself.

The power of love, light, knowing God within, is Wisdom. She lost before Caesar came to Britain because women had begun to teach their sons and loved ones to use force and might rather than wisdom and love to resolve conflict. There are no other feet at which to lay the responsibility. We taught our sons, husbands, lovers, Fathers and Uncles to belittle, demean, and take without giving respect. Man learns how to be human from his mother. Somewhere we bought the "little woman" and "We know better and will take care of you" acts thousands of years ago.

There comes a time when we need to look to ourselves and look to our source and determine what direction we choose to take. Caesar and Boadicea were both focused on winning a battle. General Suetonius was on the brink of being pushed back into the sea, and Boadicea was on the verge of victory and freedom. So who won? and why? Did either? Not really. The Roman Empire eventually did pull out, and left Britain to attempt to regroup herself. The real win would have been to forge an agreement that was mutually amenable, giving each party what they wanted. Both were intent on their own desires and needs and eventually both lost. Boadicea, the matriarch, had the tools to forge such an agreement but did not use them. Victory and defeat were her focus. Wisdom and harmony were forgotten.

As we are waging our own battles, wading through the blood and mire of the media, of tradition, of upbringing and environment, where do we place our focus. On winning an inch? To what end? What is the real win in our lives? A husband, freedom from a husband, a man, freedom from a man, a job or a position, or freedom from that? A woman? or, ...? If we looked at our world right now, could we identify where wisdom and harmony, therefore the essence of Woman dwells and manifests in wholeness and complete of herself?

I looked, and I saw you, I saw me, and I see my sisters awakening to the desperate call for wholeness and balance to heal our war torn, scorned, and battered lives on this planet. Our smile, our song, and our strength are what bring the hope of health, wealth, and happiness to our entire world, excluding not one life. That is who we are, the Being, the Child of God who looks inside herself to find the power, beauty, wisdom, and strength to nurture all humanity to wholeness.